


Hear me out; I like you

by definatelynotnathan



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Blood, Deaf Character, Deaf Seo Changbin, Friends to Lovers, IT IS REALLY IMPORTANT, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Little bit of Ableism, Little bit of angst, Minor Hwang Hyunjin/Kim Seungmin, Minor Lee Felix/Seo Changbin, Multi, POV Alternating, Please read the notes in the beginning, Rich Kim Seungmin, Strangers to Friends, also tags will be updated as the story goes on, slow burn I think?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:20:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 19,222
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28498191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/definatelynotnathan/pseuds/definatelynotnathan
Summary: Seungmin softly held on to the older's cheek. Holding on to it as if it was the most fragile thing on earth. He slowly lifted Changbin's head up, making sure that older could read his lips; making sure that at least in some way Changbin could hear what Seungmin had to say.After all this time, Seungmin finally knew. He wanted someone who could hear him.And now that he found that someone, he's never letting go."I'm sorry for running away hyung, I was confused and scared and just really reaaaaally dumb. It was wrong for me to shut you out.""How about now? are you still confused? scared?""Now? I am nothing but absolutely sure that I love you.""Even if I can't hear you?""Hyung, you don't need to hear me to know how much I love you"
Relationships: Hwang Hyunjin/Lee Felix, Kim Seungmin/Seo Changbin
Comments: 3
Kudos: 29





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> PLEASE READ
> 
> For the sake of understanding more about the context of the story, there are a few things to note.  
> If the text is:
> 
> ITALICIED = this sentence was said verbally  
> BOLDED = this sentence was said through sign language
> 
> this fic is absolutely un-beta'd. sorry hehe

Changbin likes mornings. 

He used to hate it before when he could still hear anything. But now he adores it. Unlike hearing people who hate the sound of alarms in the morning, disturbing them from their sleep, Changbin never hears that anymore. He yawns while doing a quick stretch to grab his phone. Since those noisy alarm ringtones won't work for him anymore, he learned to use the phone’s vibrate feature instead. Pushing it up to max power. Keeping it underneath his pillow so he could feel it when it vibrates. He unplugs the charger and checks it.

Sunday, 8:27 AM

He has a bit more time to spare before his shift starts. A few more stretches and the boy was up from his bed and walking out his room and into the living room. As usual, Jisung wasn’t anywhere to be seen. It would have been a miracle to see Jisung out of his room at this hour. That boy had some major issues with his sleeping schedule. How he survived college was way beyond Changbin’s comprehension at this point. 

Chanbin wandered into the kitchen, scavenging the fridge for anything edible for him to consume just to ease down the rumbles he’s feeling in his stomach. And much to his dismay, there was nothing. A sharp exhale filled with disappointment was the only thing he could do. Closing the door with his foot, Changbin made a mental note to go for groceries after his shift today.

Work was something that Changbin looked forward to every week. Being a tutor doesn’t seem much but for Changbin who was taking Education as his college major, it really compliments well. Being able to practice your major and get paid at the same time? Changbin had hit the jackpot on this one.

This wasn’t the case for Jisung though. 

A few more knocks from Changbin and finally he opens the door. Eyes still shut, half asleep, and holding on to the door to prevent himself from falling out of balance. **_“What?”_ **he signed- eyes still shut.

_“Get ready, our shift starts soon”_ Changbin’s eyes go from the younger’s feet up to his head, taking in the mess that is Jisung. _“The kids won’t like you if you look like that.”_

Jisung only gave him a whine in response. He was about to close the door but Changbin was fast enough to have stopped it with his foot. He grabbed the boy, sleepy and eyes still shut, by his wrist and gently pulled him out his room, positioning the younger in front of him. In the process, he moved his hands from the boy’s wrist towards his back; right by his shoulder. _“Come on now Ji”_

And of course, Jisung never would have made it easy for Changbin. The younger leans back and shifts his weight on to Changbin. Effectively forcing him to push them towards wherever they needed to be. Changbin was absolutely thankful Jisung slept with socks on. It made pushing him easier since his sock-covered feet were just sliding across the floor as they moved.

They’ve reached the living room, and yet Jisung was still whining. _“_ **_I can’t do it today hyuung”_ **he flailed his arms as he finished signing. He shifted his weight even more in hopes of stopping Changbin from pushing him into the showers. 

But there was no success in that. 

Chanbin had fully pushed Jisung into the bathroom now. He grabbed a towel and tossed it towards his roommate, **_“Go take a bath”_ **he signed. 

**_“Can I not go today?”_ **Jisung was giving him puppy eyes. 

**_“No, you’ve used up your last absence from last time”_ **

**_“Please.”_ ** he was pouting now. 

Changbin poked his tongue out to tease the younger as he signed, **_“No.”_ **

**_“I hate you”_ **was the last thing Jisung signed before he promptly closed the door on Changbin.

Changbin doesn’t want to admit it, especially out loud when Jisung can hear it, but he really is thankful for Jisung. Their relationship might be the usual bickering but he knows they both cared for each other.

Changbin and Jisung knew each other ever since they were little. Jisung was waaaay different before. When they first met at kindergarten, Jisung was THE crying kid. His small hands gripping on his mother’s pants. Desperately trying not to let go of his mother’s leg. He kept crying and crying. Effectively soaking his mother’s pants with his tears. He would keep on yelling _“NO!”_ or the occasional _“I don’t like it here!”_ He wouldn’t go near any of the teachers trying to console him. Telling him sweet words of encouragement that would hopefully convince the crying boy. But none of it worked. He would always go back and squeeze himself tighter onto his mother’s legs. Jisung ended up skipping his first day. 

The same thing happened the next day. Jisung was still crying, gripping his mother’s pants. Still yelling the phrases _“NO!”_ and _“Why did we go back here!”_ Changbin just stared at him. He wasn’t annoyed or sad for the crying boy. Cause little Changbin knew what he needed the most. A friend. So He let go of the green-colored crayon he was holding, thinking that coloring time can wait. With tiny steps his little kindergarten feet could stride, he walked towards the crying Jisung. Reaching out his hand for a high five.

_“Hi! My name is Changbin, would you like to be my friend?”_

And from those 12 words little Changbin spoke that day, he made a companion that would last him for a lifetime. 

* * *

The bus ride to the Tutorial Center was no different from any other day. The bus went through the same route as always. After about 10 minutes of travel Changbin and Jisung finally arrived at their stop. The tutorial center can be seen in plain sight as you get out from the stop. A two-story building with beige colored walls, a playground complete with swings, slides, sandboxes, and monkey bars placed in front, a small garden on the left, and lastly a wishing fountain on the right side. Changbin has been working here part-time for more than a year now and he still couldn’t get over the sight that is in front of him. 

What is there not to like? You could see children running around after their lessons. Yelling, laughing, and sometimes crying too. You could see the way they interact with each other, knowing which one likes which based on how they act towards each other. You’d see friendships starting to bloom. You see nothing else but the youth enjoying the gift that is today, and having no sense of fear or worry about the uncertainty of tomorrow. Just kids being kids. 

Maybe Changbin can learn a thing or two from the children.

A tap on his shoulder was the sign that Jisung had gotten out of the bus. They both walked into the building, greeting any children or staff they meet along the way. They walked into the building, greeting Mrs. Choi by the front desk. 

_“Good Morning boys”_ Mrs. Choi was the first one to speak. The two boys bow to return the greeting. 

_“Where are we assigned today Mrs. Choi?”_ Jisung asked. 

Changbin and Jisung had sort of built up a system. Whenever they were together, Jisung would be somewhat the spokesperson among the two. It wasn’t something they planned per say, it just kinda happened. Considering Changbin’s situation and Jisung being a very selfless person it wasn’t long until they adapted towards this system. And quite frankly, Changbin was happy about it.

_“Well both of you will be staying in the same room today”_ Jisung looked at Changbin with a very gummy smile _“Both of your tutees are siblings, but they have different subjects that needed to be taught.”_ Mrs. Choi rustles through a few paperworks before handing Jisung two separate sheets of papers. _“Your room is written on there, I'll leave you both to decide which one would teach which ok?”_

The two boys nodded in response. Mrs. Choi took this as her cue to go back to whatever she was working before the two arrived. They gave Mrs. Choi one last bow and a goodbye before walking towards their designated rooms. 

Changbin wasn’t feeling in the mood to talk right now, saving up the energy for it when he would be tutoring the kid later. He tapped Jisung by his shoulder to get his attention. 

**_“Which one will you take?”_ **he signed towards the younger. 

**_“You handle the hard subject hyung! I’ll take the easier one!”_ **

**_“So science for me, and maths for you?”_ **

Jisung nodded. He didn’t think to complain since he knew the math he was going to teach wasn’t going to be complicated. Their tutee was still in third grade. Third grade math is like basically division. He thought to himself. He looked at both papers and gave Changbin his. 

When they reached into their room, they were greeted with simultaneous shreeks of their names from the kids.

_“Jisung Hyung!”_ the little girl, dressed in overalls and her brown hair tied into pigtails.

_“Changbin Hyung!”_ her brother, dressed in casual jeans and a polo shirt and his hair slicked back.

The two siblings ran towards the two roommates who were gladly waiting for them with open arms. Jisung grabbed on the little girl by her armpits and promptly hoisted her into the air; granting laughter from the little girl which Jisung followed after. Changbin on the other hand let the little boy grab onto his leg like a monkey. Walking with the boy latched on, raising his leg as high as he can as he stepped forward. The room was filled with nothing but laughter

_“Are you going to teach us today?”_ The little girl, Hyesu, asked as soon as Jisung put her down. 

_“Yep! I'm going to be teaching little Hyesu,”_ he placed his hand on the young girl’s head _“And your Changbin hyung,”_ he tapped the older boy who was still busy entertaining the other child, which was still grabbing on to his leg, on his shoulder. Getting his attention. _“Will be the one to teach little Insu”_

Changbin gave the young girl a smile. Insu, who was previously grabbing onto Changbin’s leg, had finally let go. They pulled on the hem of Changbin’s cardigan; grabbing his attention. 

_“What will you be teaching me today?”_ the little boy asked. 

_“Well, you’re scheduled for science today,”_ he bent down. The little boy’s eyes followed him down. _“Will that be ok for you Injunnie?”_

The little boy’s face lit up as he nodded. Changbin held Inju’s hand and led him towards the table. 

_“Let's start?”_

* * *

a few hour later and both kids were almost done with their lessons. Today seems to be one of those productive days. The kids were able to understand the topics and keywords so far with the tutor explaining it to them twice only. If they keep this pace up they’ll be done in about twenty more minutes. The two tutors get to go home earlier and the kids would have more time to play outside. This is a win for both parties. Though, the topic being taught wasn’t that hard to grasp. Basic principles of solid, liquid, and gasses. Plus, Inju is a smart kid. He learned how to read as early as 5 years old. It would have been more surprising if Inju couldn’t handle this lesson. 

_“Very good Injunnie, why don’t you answe-''_ a buzz inside Changbin’s pocket had prompted him to cut his sentence short. He pulled out his phone to check who was texting him. An unknown number.

_“Injunnie, continue answering the next questions ok? Let me just check this for a bit ok?”_

The little boy nodded and continued to answer the activity sheet.

Changbin unlocked his phone and went into his messages. Knowing that it was from an unknown number, curiosity and a little bit of nervousness had bubbled inside him. It read; 

  
  


_“Good day Mr. Seo Changbin, this is the secretary of the Guidance Counseling Office. I would like to inform you that the Guidance Counselor has scheduled a meeting for you both tomorrow at 10:00AM. Please take note that I was told this was an important meeting therefore please do attend. If you have any questions or contradictions towards the scheduled meeting, send me an email at SKUGuidance@SKU.edu.com “_

Chanbin was baffled. Why would the Guidance Counselor want to meet him so suddenly? and labeling it as an important meeting was something he wouldn’t have thought of having. He started recalling everything he has ever done within the past few weeks. Trying to find out if he has done something wrong. Maybe he threw trash mindlessly and people reported him for it. Or maybe he was framed from cheating a test or something. Even the most absurd reason flashed inside his head. 

A tap on his arm pulled him out of his thoughts. Inju had finished answering his activity sheet and was looking at him with curious eyes. Changbin gathered himself up and focused on the task in hand. He still had a kid to teach. He checked Inju’s paper and told him they were done for today. The little kid was jumping from excitement. He looked over to Jisung and they seemed to be finishing up as well. 

The kids bid their farewells to their older brothers. Both Jisung and Changbin were able to finish the tutoring session earlier as expected. Both children were lovely and cooperated well. Now they both get to go home earlier than expected. 

They walked out of their assigned room and went towards the lobby area. As they arrived, they both bowed down to bid farewell to the lady by the front desk. As they both were about to reach the door they were called back. 

_“I almost forgot to tell you boys,”_ she started, bending down out of sight to rumble through her drawers and other compartments looking for something. Once she found what she was looking for, she stood back up and handed them both a single envelope. _“These are your salaries for this month.”_

Jisung and Changbin looked at each other. Eyebrows weaved together in confusion. _“Uhhhh.. were not complaining,”_ Jisung paused, seemingly trying to find the right words. _“But isn’t this a bit too early?”_

_“And why is there only one?”_ Changbin added. 

The lady looked at them both with both sincerity and guilt in her eyes. _“I'm so sorry boys but we’re having a bit of a financial problem right now and we're trying to fix our budget right now.”_

The two boys knew exactly what was going to happen. They kept quiet and let her continue talking. 

_“So, I’m very sorry to say but we’re only able to afford one tutor right now. This is the last session for one of you.”_ she slid the envelope closer to them both, _“we can’t decide who, so we hope that you make the decision yourselves. I'm really sorry boys”_

She bowed down and excused herself. 

The two boys were just standing there; dumbstruck. They didn’t think this would happen. Changbin liked working here. He had grown fond of not only the children but the staff and environment too. He just loved this place so much. It would have been a tragedy to leave. But he knew Jisung needed a job. So he took the envelope. 

_“You should stay here Ji. You need the money. I could always look for a new job.”_ he placed his hand on Jisung’s shoulder. 

But it seems that Jisung doesn’t have the same idea as Changbin. He shook Changbin's hand off and took the envelope from him. 

_“No hyung. You stay here.”_ Jisung said, making sure to look at Changbin so they could read his lips.

_“You need this job more than I do Ji”_ ****

_“I'm not arguing with you about this hyung, it’s decided. You’re staying.”_ ****

_“Since when did you get so bossy to decide?”_ Changbin jokes, but Jisung remained unfaltered. Keeping eyes locked on with Changbin’s. His demeanor has suddenly changed. **_“_ ** _Seriously though Ji, I can always look for a job. There are so many hiring right now. I can surely get one spot.”_

_“No you can't.”_ Jisung crossed his arms across his chest. 

_“What makes you so sure?”_ Changbin counters. 

_“Because you’re Deaf hyung.”_ ****

Ouch. 

Changbin’s gaze fell down towards his fingers which was now fidgeting. His thumbs rubbing on the pads of his index fingers. He didn’t think Jisung would just blurt it out like that. But Jisung was right. He was only lucky enough to be able to get a job here. There aren't many jobs being offered for people with hearing disabilities. People like Changbin. Though, nevertheless, it still kinda stung.

He wasn’t even supposed to get this job in the first place. They were really hesitant in hiring Changbin for many obvious reasons; however, Jisung was very persistent. Telling them about Changbin’s academic status, his skills, and his personality. He even kept mentioning how communication won’t be a problem since Changbin can read lips. After a few hours of persuasion they finally decided to hire Changbin too. They still kept an eye on him for the first few months. But after seeing that the children love him and they’re actually learning something from him, they decided to let Changbin stay.

Jisung moved his foot forward into Chanbin’s view and started waving it, letting the older know that he wanted him to look up. Changbin did so. 

_“Hyung, It’s really hard for you to find a job right now.”_

Changbin nodded. 

Jisung flashed him his signature gummy smile, placing his hand on Changbin’s shoulder. _“You stay ok? I’ll be the one to look for another.”_

Changbin nods and hands Jisung the envelope he was still holding on to, which the younger gladly accepts as they walk out the building. 

They reached the bus stop just in time for the bus to come by a few minutes later. They went in and sat down in the back row. Chanbin preferred to sit by the window. Since he can’t use music to distract himself, he settled with just looking outside as the bus drove. He would sometimes count how many things he could see that were in a specific color or he would count how many animals they would pass by. But there are some days where he just stares; his mind going blank. Today was one of those days. 

A tap on his thigh pulled Changbin out of his headspace. He turned his head towards the source.

  
  
**_“I was thinking,”_ ** _Jisung signed._

Since they were in a bus and most times people in it during this hour are either tired or extremely grumpy. Signing seems to be a good choice for now since they wouldn’t want to disturb anyone. He knows that Jisung unintentionally raises his voice a little bit when he tries to be vocal with Changbin. They learned this through multiple confrontations from strangers telling them to keep it down. 

**_“Will you go Job-hunting with me tomorrow?”_ ** Jisung continued, **_“My classes end at 11AM tomorrow and yours don’t start until three in the afternoon.”_ **

**_“I’d love to,”_ ** Changbin signed back, **_“But I can’t”_ **

**_“Why? Think of it as us hanging out! It's been a while since we both got out to do something!”_ **

Changbin unknowingly took a deep breath, **_“The guidance office texted me a few hours ago while I was teaching Inju,”_ **he looked at Jisung, waiting for a response. But he was met with the younger just looking at him, eyebrows slightly coming together in confusion. He was waiting for Changbin to continue. 

**_“They said I needed to meet them tomorrow at 10AM”_ **

**_“Did they tell you why?”_ **Jisung asked. 

Changbin shook his head as he shrugged. 

Jisung looked as if he was thinking about something deeply. Eyes looking down, eyebrows now even more closer together, lips in a slight pout, and his thumb and index finger rubbing on his chin. You could practically see the gears in his mind working. After a few moments his facial expression changed from serious to bright.

  
  
**_“How about dinner tonight?”_ ** He signed **_“Treat is on me”_ ** his lips forming a grin as he waved the envelope around.

  
  
**_“Just the two of us?”_ ** Changbin asked

  
  
**_“We can invite Felix and Minho hyung too!”_ **the younger fished his phone from his pocket and started scrolling for their friend’s contacts. After a few moments of typing, he finally hit send. 

Jisung then latched on to Changbin’s arms, he stayed there for a while until his phone vibrated and showed confirmation messages from their friends. He let go for a moment to sign, **_“It’s settled then, were going dinner tonight”_ **

* * *

Chanbin was woken up by the vibrations underneath his pillow. 

He stretched and grabbed the phone to turn the alarm off with his eyes closed. They felt extra heavy today. It was no denying that Changbin was still very sleepy. Their dinner last night ended up with his other two friends Felix and Minho coming over for some cheap beer and a movie. Their half-sober conversations lasted until Felix and Minho had to go home at 11PM. They mainly talked about the “one of us goes home and won’t be working anymore” situation. Felix and Minho had voiced out their opinion too, saying that Jisung was right to let him stay and continue teaching there. And he understood why. 

Another set of vibrations finally made him decide that it was time to get up. He had to go to the Guidance Office by 10:00AM. He had a few or so to spend. A rumble on his stomach was the deciding factor on what he should spend the extra time with. Breakfast. 

Slowly and surely he got off from his bed and walked out of his room. And to his surprise Jisung was already up and in the kitchen. From the looks of it Jisung is trying to make breakfast. Emphasis on trying. Seeing drops of pancake batter on the floor up to the kitchen counter, unwashed plates, and an open bag of pancake mix, was enough to tell Changbin that this wasn’t Jisung’s first attempt. 

_“Hey,”_ Changbin voiced out. Maybe a little too loud since it was enough to make Jisung jump and splatter more pancake mix into the kitchen from the pancake batter-covered spoon he was holding. 

**_“Hey! Don’t scare me like that!”_** Jisung signed. Still holding the pancake batter-covered spoon. Again, spreading more drops of pancake mix into the kitchen. **_“Why are you up so early? Your meeting with the guidance is still a few hours from now.”_** Jisung paused as he went back and flipped the pancakes. **“** ** _And why are you talking? I know sign language.”_** he signed, now looking back at Chanbin.

_“Well you’re cooking pancakes.”_ Changbin stops to look at the pan, eyeing two surprisingly good looking pancakes. _“I THINK they’re pancakes.”_ He continued, purposely sounding confused. Jisung proceeded to hit Chanbing’s rib with his elbow. A laugh came from the elder. _“Besides, it's dangerous for you to use sign language while cooking. You need to focus on whatever you’re cooking. We don’t want the room to burn down.”_ He said while cleaning up the mess that Jisung made. 

After a few minutes of cleaning Changbin felt a nudge on his back. He turned around to see Jisung holding up two plates with pancakes on top of them. Going towards the table, setting down the plates and sitting down. Changbin followed after him.

**_“Why did you make breakfast?”_ ** Changbin signed, chewing on his pancakes. **_“You hate mornings,”_ ** he continued. 

**_“Well, think of it as a mood lifter”_ ** Jisung gave Changbin a smile. **_“You seemed really bothered by the text from the guidance office yesterday. So I decided to make you a good breakfast! So you know that today will be a good day and i'm here for you”_ **Jisung’s smile grew even wider.

Changbin looked at Jisung with wide eyes. It's things like this that remind him that even if Jisung is annoying most of the time, he really does care for him. That loud and obnoxious Jisung actually knows how to lift Changbin’s spirit up. And he’s really thankful for that. 

Changbin returned the gesture; giving Jisung his biggest smile yet. **_“Thank you so much Jisung. I appreciate it”_ **he signed.

The response he got in return was Jisung fake gagging and laughing aferwards.

**_“I'm sorry I couldn't go job hunting with you Ji.”_ ** continuing their conversation. **_“ you did leave me to teach alone in the Tutorial Center so karma for you”_ ** He signed

**_“Hyung! I thought these pancakes would make you forgive me! I’m sorry ok? It wasn’t my fault they were having a financial crisis!”_** Changbin couldn’t hear it but he was sure Jisung was whining. **_“If you’re not going to forgive me then stop eating!”_** Jisung was reaching out to get Changbin’s plate but he was stopped when Changbin pulled the plate towards them making it out of reach for Jisung. 

**_“I’m kidding Ji”_ ** they were both laughing now. **_“But seriously though, if you don’t find anything today, i’ll help you look next time”_ ** Changbin gave him a reassuring smile. 

**_“I’ll remember that!”_** with that said, they were both finished with their plates at this point. **_“Hyung I’ll wash your plate. Go and get ready. The campus is a bit far from here so it might take you a while”_** Jisung was already up and bringing both their plates to the sink. 

_“Thanks for the breakfast Ji!”_ Changbin voiced out, going back to his room to take his towel. 

* * *

As the bus reached its stop, Changbin had now been fully sumbmerged with worry. Multiple scenarios have been clouding his head during the trip. His head filled with all the what if's. He just couldn't stop worrying about what would happen.

He got off the bus, dragging his feet that felt like it was chained to the heavy thoughts in his head. He paced toward the entrance. Getting more and more worried. He mentally slapped himself. trying to keep his mind off of things. He looked straight. He fixed his composure. He tapped his ID from last year. He smiled at the security guard on duty by the gate. He greeted good morning to the janitors sweeping leaves off the floor. He tried everything he could to make himself look like he didn't want to scream. He tried.

He was so scared. They have never called him so suddenly like this. He's been in this school for more than two years now and yet this is the first time they did this. Changbin wasn't a bad student. but he was often called to the guidance office. Not because he did something wrong. But it was always about his disability. 

For the past two years they've been insisting that Changbin shouldn't be here. They keep saying that there were schools that were accessible for students like him. They suggested that he would transfer. But he always declined. 

A loud sigh was the only thing that came out of Changbin as he sat down on the sofa in the lobby, _"I guess they have had enough of me"_ he thought to himself bouncing his leg in nervousness.

He could just leave right now and never acknowledge that he was called in today. He just had to do it before the secretary called him into the room. But he threw that though away when he felt a tap on his shoulder. Turning around to see the secretary, beaming at him, holding her hand up to motion towards the door to the Guidance Counselor's office.

And with all the remaining sanity he had left, he took a deep breath and went through the door, leaving it open as he stepped inside. With his best smile, he bowed down to greet the woman behind the desk.

_"Good morning Mrs. Moon"_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! this is my first ever fic yay!  
> this was supposed to be a social media AU on twitter but unfortunately my phone broke and i wasnt able to edit any supposed conversations and what not. And it felt really bad having to stop the progress i've made so here i am writing this fic :) 
> 
> im sorry if this chapter was a bit short? i promise the next chapters are going to be longer! idk how long this fic is going to be? but im just going to roll with it until im satisfied lmao


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seungmin arrives in Korea to finally live his life independently

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! i know this update took really long. i dont want to make excuses but college really is taking most of my time :/ i was only able to write the first chapter because it was during Christmas break :( but i really do try to write as often as i can. most free time i have are usually used up for my rest/sleep. so i really am sorry! 
> 
> to compensate, im going to post chapter 3 next week. it wont be that long i think? we'll see.

This wasn’t the first time Seungmin had ridden an airplane. He’d done that so many times; way too much for someone his age. But he wasn’t doing it alone though. For as long as he can remember, he’s been travelling with his family whenever they would get free time. Even if it was only for two days, immediately booking a flight the day before. They went to wherever they wanted - well wherever his parents wanted. With the destination usually decided by his mother as she scrolls through posts online, saying  _ “this place looks good we should go there!”  _ It has been like that ever since. 

But today felt different. No, not felt, it really was different. 

For once, Seungmin traveled alone. This wasn’t a trip where his parents were involved in. This was something he’s decided on his own. 

_ “Sir,”  _ a voice called out. Seungmin turned his head towards the source.  _ “Please put your seatbelt on, the plane is about to depart”  _

_ “Oh, sorry”  _ He replied, clipping the buckles together by his waist and pulling the strap to tighten it. 

The flight attendant was already gone when Seungmin finished buckling the belt. Probably somewhere reminding passengers like him who still haven't buckled up. He fished out his phone from his pocket. He might as well turn it on airplane mode before they remind him again. 

And right on cue, the captain spoke.  _ “Good day everyone, this is your captain speaking. We are about to depart in a few minutes. This is going to be a 11-hour flight from Vancouver, Canada to Soul, South Korea. Before everything else I would like to remind everyone to buckle your seatbelts and please turn off any mobile devices or place them into airplane mode before we depart. Thank you for choosing Air Canada and we hope you enjoy your flight”  _

Seungmin took a deep breath in an attempt to calm down the fireworks he’s feeling in his veins. Fireworks that make him squirm in his seat. Make him bounce his leg up and down. Make him have the constant urge to touch something. But he shouldn’t be feeling this way. This is what he wanted for so long. A chance to be independent. To be responsible for what he does. Yet why does he feel like it's wrong? It feels like an itch in his body he can’t scratch. It's an unpleasant feeling for sure. 

Seungmin lowered the hand he was unconsciously nibbling by the nail. He’s nervous. He only does this when he’s nervous. 

Why is he nervous? Everything is planned out. He took enough money for him to last at least a few months, rent included. Since he’s going to be living independently now, the money will give him at least a month for finding a part time job before he runs out of money. And speaking of rent, he knew where he would live. Hyunjin has been looking for a roommate for a while now. He’d simply just ask him and surely he won’t decline. Seungmin also brought all the important paperwork needed, his Visa, birth certificates, medical records, school records, and the acceptance letter for SKU, the same college Hyunjin is in. It's a week before the school year starts. That is enough time for him to enroll and settle in. And then, Seungmin finally gets to live 

Everything is planned out. There is no way this is going to go badly. Right? 

Too deep into his thoughts and worries the boy hadn’t noticed that the plane had already departed. He sighs and deflates back into his seat. 

_ “11 more hours Seungmin,”  _ he whispers to himself, eyes closed.  _ “You’ll be fine.”  _

  
  


* * *

The flight wasn’t that bad. Well mostly because Seungmin spent half of it asleep but whenever he was up, there weren’t any problems. No child crying, no annoying armrest hogger, no snoring seatmate, and the people behind him haven’t kicked his chair. This was a good start for the boy. 

A voice echoed through the speakers,  _ “Hello once again everybody, this is your captain speaking. After the long 11 hour wait we’ve finally reached South Korea. We would be landing in a few minutes so please remember to fasten your seatbelts when the seatbelt light above you turns on. Thank you for choosing Air Canada.”  _

He’s almost there. A few more minutes. He just had to hold on a little bit. It's finally happening. If he felt fireworks in his veins hours ago, now it felt like fucking bombs. Exploding in every part of his body. He’s sweating so hard, his heart is beating faster than ever, his leg bouncing up and down like there was no tomorrow. 

Seungmin felt like he waited ages for the light to finally turn on. Immediately buckling up as it lit up. He couldn’t contain his excitement. It's finally happening. After how many years, it's finally happening. 

It wasn’t long until they finally landed safely. He could hear people clapping somewhere. He never understood why they did that. But who was he to judge them. He unbuckled his seatbelt and stood up to grab his hand-carried luggage at the compartment above him and proceeded to walk out afterwards. He thanked and bid farewell towards the flight attendant at the door. She responded with a nod and a bright smile as the boy walked into the boarding bridge which led to the airport terminal. 

The airport was the same as the one in Canada. Well, not really. But they had their own similarities. The conveyor belts, the rows of chairs that held passengers awaiting their plane, a front desk of some sort to help any foreigners with any concerns, and lets not forget the shops so people could buy late souvenirs. 

_ “I should buy Hyunjin something”  _ Seungmin thought to himself. 

He stood by the conveyor belt to get the suitcase he packed up. He already saw it at the back somewhere so he was only waiting for it to arrive in front of him. When his suitcase reached him he was taken aback at how the design and color really made it stand out from the other suitcase. As much as he hated it, it was the only type of suitcase he could find at home. It was those cliché brown Louis Vuitton bags. The ones where their logo was literally spread across the fabric. It basically screamed “I’m richer than anyone one of you” to those who saw it. 

Overcoming the shame and dislike towards the brown suitcase following behind him, Seungmin decided it was best to buy Hyunjin souvenirs. It's the least he could do for him for suddenly visiting - no, suddenly moving in into his shared apartment. He’s sure that his friend would be baffled. 

Walking in, Seungmin was hit with the cool breeze of the air conditioning unit placed above the entrance. His eyes darting around towards the multitudes of goodies stacked in a few aisles of shelves, trying to look for the best thing to give his - hopefully - new roommate. He walked towards the aisle nearest to the entrance. This aisle seems to be where food-related souvenirs are. The shelf was filled with snacks like gummies, tteokbokki chips, honey chips, even seaweed crackers. The shelf beside it held the instant noodles while the one behind it held the beverages. 

_ “I don’t think he’d like these,”  _ Seungmin thought to himself. Hyunjin was loaded. He probably could buy as many of these as he can. So he guesses this was a no-no. 

He walked deeper into the store where the other shelves were located. He eventually reached the stationary section of the shop. It was filled with different kinds of papers, notebooks, pens, and even stickers. It felt like Seungmin had hit the jackpot if he was to buy stuff for himself. 

But Hyunjin wouldn’t like any of these. 

That boy despises anything art related, so those were a big no-no. Seungmin had probably spent a few minutes trying to look around. Searching for that perfect souvenir to give. Going into every corner. Peeking into the farthest side of the shelves just to see if something good is hidden. He even has gotten so desperate to even kneel down to look into the lowest shelf. He could probably ransack the whole shop at this point. And finally - after a few more minutes of searching he finally laid eyes upon it. Hidden somewhere in the farthest aisle of the store sat a llama plushie, fully fluffed with beige colored wool which immediately felt so soft in between Seungmin’s fingers as he traced the shape of the stuffed toy.. 

Hyunjin is going to like this. 

Finally able to decide, he took the llama plushie as he strides towards the cashier. He placed the toy in between his arm and the side of his chest as he took two packs of yakult gummies by the snack aisle along the way. He has to treat himself too. 

Once Seungmin was finally outside the airport he stood still for a second, looking around in awe. His mouth was locked slightly apart. He could feel his breathing stop for a moment. He was finally here. His eyes moved to look up into the sky. It was now five in the afternoon, the sun slowly going out of view as it settled down but was still visible enough to fill the sky with a very deep yellow color, contrasted by the dark clouds slowly replacing it from its previous position in the sky. Seungmin has never found the setting sky much more beautiful than ever. He proceeded to inhale the deepest breath he could manage, inhaling the air of no other than South Korea. 

And just like the sun, Seungmin was going to settle down too. No more feeling lost. No more feeling useless. And most importantly, no more hiding who he wants to be. 

He grabbed his suitcase and walked to the line of yellow-colored cabs waiting by the road. When he got close enough to the taxi-cabs by the end of the line the driver (he  _ thinks  _ its the driver) motioned towards him. 

_ “Will you need a cab sir?”  _

_ “Yes please”  _ he nodded. 

The driver goes inside the cab for a bit to unlock the trunk. As he got out, his face shifted into panic as he sees Seungmin loading the suitcase himself. 

_ “Oh no! Sir please, let me do it”  _ the driver went around the cab to grab it. 

Seungmin accepted the offer and gave him a bow and then thanked him before climbing into the backseat of the cab. Not long after he heard the trunk thud close and the driver was getting in and readjusting his seat comfortably. 

_ “Where to sir?”  _

Shit. 

Seungmin has no idea where Hyunjin’s apartment is. He could try to call him and ask but he wanted to surprise him and calling him would definitely ruin the surprise. All Seungmin knows is that it is located exactly one block from SKU and has this weird looking water fountain outside. Maybe the driver knows. 

_ “Um I’m sorry but I don’t really know the address,”  _ he sheepishly said,  _ “but I do know some landmarks? Would that be ok?”  _

_ “Of course, tell me what you know and I’ll try my best to take you there sir.”  _ The driver started the car and slowly went out into the main road. 

_ “It’s - um by SKU?” _ He wasn't sure if the driver knew where that is.

_ “I might need you to be a bit more specific sir I’m afraid.. What are we looking for exactly? A hotel? _ ”

_ “An apartment building. It has a fountain outside? It’s a weird looking fountain?”  _

Somehow that reply made Seungmin mentally slap himself. How the hell would the driver know what he meant by ‘weird looking fountain’ ?

_ “Ah! I see”  _

Oh nevermind.

_ “You must be going to Northwind, they’re the only apartment complex that has a fountain outside.”  _ the driver looked at Seungmin through the rear-view mirror,  _ “I’ve heard it’s quite expensive there.”  _

_ “Yeah that’s what my friends said too. I'm still unsure why he chose to live there to be honest. But who am I to judge his life right?”  _ **_  
  
_ **

The driver just hummed and nodded in response before looking back at the road. 

* * *

After what seemed to be more than an hour of traveling on the road and one pack of yakult gummies, Seungmin had finally arrived at the Apartment Building. And boy does it look expensive. It's a staggering twelve-floored building with large windows for exterior walls with balconies extending from them. The building was beautifully painted with a mixture of grey-beige colors. Seungmin looked at it by the front gate because apparently no vehicle is allowed to enter the gates unless you had a parking card which they only gave to the tenants here. So the taxi-cab had no choice but to drop him to where he is situated now.

After taking in the extravagance of the building he finally moved from the spot he was rooted on for more than a minute. With a backpack, a duffel bag slung on his left shoulder, and his suitcase being dragged behind him with his right arm, he walked past the guard stationed by the gate. The guard, seeing Seungmin with luggage, doesn’t bother stopping him for questions. 

The interior was even more expensive-looking than the exterior of the building. With shiny tiles spread across the lobby, furniture with a gold, white, and gray color palette, a marbled-top front desk, an elevator, and even a gold chandelier hanging on the highly elevated ceiling. Even the air felt expensive for Seungmin. 

He walked over to the young lady by the front desk.    
  


_ “Good evening sir! What can I do for you?”  _ she bowed and smiled at him with hands clasped in front of her.

He bowed back.  _ “Hi, i'm here to visit someone from here. Do you mind giving them a call?”  _

_ “Sure! What room are they in?”  _

_ “I don’t actually know what room they live in, would a name work?”  _ He sheepishly replied as he scratched the back of his neck.

_ “Yeah but it might take a second, would that be ok?”  _

_ “yes , thank you. His name is Hwang Hyunjin”  _

_ “Please excuse me for a second”  _ she took a book out from an organizer beside her computer screen and started flipping through it. Stopping at a page, she slowly dragged her index finger through the page, trying to look for the given name.  _ “Ah, here it is”  _

As she was about to pick up the phone to call the room, Seungmin spoke up to stop her,  _ “would it be ok if you don’t tell him that someone is here? Can you tell him something came for him like a package or something? I'm here as a surprise actually”  _

With a smile, she nodded her head and proceeded to dial the room. 

_ “Good Evening Mr. Hwang. I’d like to inform you that something came for you and it will be here at the front desk for you to claim……. Yes it's a package……..no they didn’t specify where it was from,”  _ the lady looked at Seungmin with a smile on her face,  _ “Yes, okay Mr. Hwang. It will be here, Good evening once again sir.”  _ and with that she placed the telephone back. 

_ “He’ll be down in a minute sir”  _

_ “Thank you so much”  _ Seungmin bowed down. 

Now that he had Hyunjin coming down it was time to complete the surprise. He fished out his phone to give Hyunjin a quick text. 

**Seungmin [6:52 PM]**

Are you up? 

Im bored, 

very bored.

**Hyunjin [6:52 PM]**

Yep. i'm actually in the elevator right now

**Seungmin [6:53 PM]**

Why? 

I’ll call you, im too lazy to text lmao

**Hyunjin [6:52 PM]**

K.

**Seungmin [6:53 PM]**

RUDE.

Seungmin dialed the number and placed his phone by his ear. Hyunjin picked up at the second ring. 

_ “Hello lazy ass”  _ Hyunjin immediately said when the call connected 

_ “Hello to you too bastard,”  _ Seungmin replied, gaining a chuckle from the other line.  _ “Where are you going? It's like 6 pm here. Why are you going out this late.”  _ Seungmin turned to the side to see the lady from the front desk smiling at her. Giving him a thumbs up. She probably heard what he said right now. He smiled back

_ “I'm not going out, I'm just going down to the lobby. Some package arrived for me. I didnt even order anything online.”  _

_ “That’s weird”  _

_ “I know right?? What if its like a bomb, or like a decapitated head with an ominous message like ‘you’re next’ or something?” _

_ “Well? Have you made any enemies recently?”  _ Seungmin joked. 

_ “Maybe???”  _ fear and confusion can be heard from Hyunjin’s voice, Seungmin was trying his best not to laugh.  _ “Hey I just left the elevator, I’ll call you back when I go back to my room yeah?”  _

Seungmin was suddenly aware of his heart beating rapidly. His hands were starting to feel clammy. With his free hand, he started combing through his hair. Trying to make it as presentable as possible. 

_ “I don’t think it's necessary,”  _ Seungmin said.

_ “Why no-”  _

The Hyunjin’s sentence was cut short. Because right now, he’s standing in front of the front desk where Seungmin stood. He was frozen in place, right hand still raised to hold his phone by his ear with his eyes wide and mouth agape. Unable to speak or form any coherent thought in his mind because Standing in front of him was no other than Seungmin. His best friend ever since they were children. His best friend that was beside him through thick and thin. His best friend that was SUPPOSED to be in Canada right now. 

Soft snickers were heard from the other line of the phone by his ear. Seungmin was looking down softly laughing, still holding his phone by his ear too. And by the time Seungmin had let all the amused laughter out of his sistem. He looked up and finally met Hyunjin in the eyes. 

_ “Surprise.”  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you're still reading this THANK YOU! 
> 
> you can follow me at my twitter @itsmrcgo. i moved accounts so if you followed the last account i had written its gone now lmao


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seungmin finally meets Hyunjin and his friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! sorry if this was way behind the promised "i'll post the next chapter next week" ._. this chapter is a bit longer than the other two (the other two were 4k and this is 6k) so i hope that compensates. 
> 
> also this chapter is a bit dialogue heavy since there is like a meet and greet happening somewhere.

If only Seungmin had his camera slung around his neck right now, he would have immediately taken a picture of the absolute shock-stricken face of the one and only Hwang Hyunjin. But due to unfortunate events, Sungmin's camera was long gone. So instead he settles with ingraining this into his head. It's going to be one of those long-term memories. Seungmin is absolutely sure about that.

Hyunjin was still in disbelief. His brain short circuiting as it tries to comprehend the absolute shocker he just experienced during his 20 years of life. His eyes still wide, his mouth still agape, and his chest beating like crazy (but he’s choosing to ignore that.) His head starts to dart between Seungmin and the woman by the front desk who has nothing but a smile plastered on her. 

_ “Is that the way to greet your old friend?”  _ Seungmin spoke up to spare Hyunjin from losing his mind. 

Hyunjin looks at the woman one last time,  _ “but... yo-you”  _ he gives the woman a small accusatory point,  _ “you said there was a package for me?”  _

The woman laughed.  _ “I’m sorry sir,”  _ she bows down slightly, still with her smile on.  _ “I was only following orders”  _

_ “What..”  _

_ “Hyunjin,”  _ Seungmin called out, which made Hyunjin turn,  _ “I told her to call you, tell you that you had a package so you would go down here”  _

_ “So there is no package?”  _ the boy started to scratch his head in confusion. 

_ “No you idiot,”  _ Seungmin chuckles and points at himself,  _ “I am the package.”  _

_ “Oh.”  _

Seungmin was laughing now, maybe the woman was too but Hyunjin didn’t focus on that. Seungmin was now here in front of him. And boy did he want to hug him so bad. 

So he did. 

He ran up to Seungmin, wrapping his arms around his neck. Giving him the most bone-crushing hug he could ever give. And Seungmin reciprocated the hug too as he wraps his arms around Hyunjin’s waist. It's been awhile since they hugged. The last time they did was during their last year of middle school. Just before Seungmin had to be homeschooled. 

Even with his head practially drilled into Seungmin it wasn’t enough to keep Hyunjin from murmuring a muffled  _ “I missed you so fucking much”  _

Seungmin raised one of his hands to pat the boy’s back.  _ “I missed you too bud,”  _ he continued to pat Hyunjin’s back. He should have released him by now but it's been a while and Seungmin is willing to give this one an exception. However, there is another surprise that still needs to be revealed,  _ “you know there is actually a package for you”  _

Hyunjin immediately broke away from the hug, hands still clasped on Seungmin’s shoulder and eyebrows knit together in the middle,  _ “I thought that was a lie? To make me come down here?”  _

_ “Well, yeah but it's a little bit true too”  _ Seungmin removed a strap from his shoulder and placed his backpack in front of him as he started rummaging through it. Not soon after he pulls out a white paper bag and hands it to Hyunjin. 

_ “Whats this?”  _ he asked as he reluctantly tkes the paper bag from his friend’s hands.

_ “A gift. Duh?”  _

Hyunjin rolled his eyes,  _ “I know jackass, but what for?”  _

Seungmin placed his hands on his hips.  _ “I refuse to visit my long-lost best friend without a single gift.”  _

_ “You say that like we were separated by some unfortunate accident or something”  _

They were both laughing at the remark. After a few moments of laughter had passed Hyunjin hurriedly opened the paper bag, pulling out the white llama stuffed toy Seungmin had bought. Seungmin couldn’t stop the smile growing on his face. 

_ “HE’S ADORABLE!”  _ Hyunjin exclaimed, clutching the stuffed animal on his chest.  _ “I LOVE IT! THANK YOU SO MUCH!”  _

Hyunjin was a little bit too loud so Seungmin had to come closer and cover his mouth with his left hand,  _ “Quiet down Jin! Not too loud!”  _ he warned in a hushed voice,  _ “but you’re welcome Jin.”  _

Hyunjin grabbed Seungmin’s hand on his mouth, wrapping his fingers by the wrist as he pulled it down,  _ “I know just the place to put him,”  _ Hyunjin motioned towards the elevator with his head,  _ “Come on, let’s go up. You might be exhausted from carrying those bags”  _

Seungmin didn’t bother to complain as Hyunjin dragged him into the elevator. Seungmin managed to give off one last bow as goodbye to the lady by the front desk where she also bowed in return, a big smile still plastered on her face. 

They both reach the elevator and Hyunjin wasted no time in pushing Seungmin inside (thankfully there was no one else inside) and hastily pushed the button for his floor. When they reached their destination, Hyunjin had somehow decided to walk at a normal pace to his room. They passed through three doors from the elevator before Hyunjin had stopped infront of his. He fished out his key from his pocket and finally opened the door.

Hyunjin went inside first but stopped behind the door to keep it open for Seungmin, _ “Come in!”  _

Seungmin followed. His baggage dragging behind.  _ “I know this is a very bad time to say this but I hope you don’t mind me coming here”  _

_ “Of course I wouldn’t mind!”  _ Hyunjin went towards the shelf by the corner of the room and placed the Llama stuffed toy on the empty space.  _ “I wouldn’t even mind you staying here forever with me!”  _ he said as he was pacing towards the kitchen and rummaging for mugs from the cabinets above. 

Seungmin was still standing by the hallway, unsure on where to put his stuff.  _ “Hey,”  _ he hears Hyunjin as the boy poked his head from the kitchen,  _ “Coffee? I know its late but I ran out of tea and I know you don’t like Cola, which sadly is like the only thing I have in here”  _

_ “I’ll take the coffee! I’m feeling very tired from flying for hours! I might pass out anytime now”  _

_ “Okay!”  _ he hears Hyunjin respond. A few moments passed and the boy emerged from the kitchen with two mugs on hand. He offers one to his guest (which was graciously accepted) as he leads them both into the living room to have a seat. 

They both take a sip from the steaming mugs in comfortable silence until Hyunjin notices Seungmin’s luggage by the door which prompts him to ask,  _ “by the way, where are you going to stay? Did you book a room beforehand?”  _

_ “About that,”  _ Seungmin sets down his mug onto the table’s coaster,  _ “you’re still looking for a roommate right?”  _ he hesitates for a bit,  _ “I was hoping I could you know….move in”  _

If Seungmin was nervous while asking, now he’s absolutely TERRIFIED because not only was Hyunjin looking at him with an unreadable demeanor, he was also deafeningly silent. 

_ “I-I’ll pay half the rent! O-or sixty percent if you want!”  _ Seungmin was taking his phone out of his pocket, _ “But you can say no! Uuuh..um yeah. I-I’ll just book a room”  _

A hand then grips onto Seungmin’s as he fiddles with his phone. He looks up and sees Hyunjin smiling at him. 

_ “Minnie,”  _ Hyunjin’s thumb lightly rubbing across Seungmin’s wrist,  _ “of course you can move in, i’d actually prefer you moving in rather than a complete stranger.”  _

_ “Really? I can totally book another hotel right now”  _ Seungmin replies 

_ “Yeah! The roommate hunt can wait until you go back to Canada. Before that, you’re absolutely free to stay here.” _

_ “Oh,” _ of course Hyunjin would misunderstand.Seungmin tries again.  _ “Jin, I’m not going back”  _

_ “Yeah, for how long though? The longest time your dad let you have a vacation was like what? Month maybe? Will you stay for the month? Because if so you don’t really need to worry about paying ren-”  _

_ “Jin.”  _ Seungmin stops him. Hyunjin only looks at him with confusion,  _ “I’m not going back. Like, ever.”  _

Hyunjin immediately shoots up from his seat.  _ “You’re kidding,”  _ he goes to grab Seungmin by his shoulders and starts shaking him.  _ “You’re not fucking with me right now right?”  _

_ “I’m not Hyunjin”  _ Seungmin replies, not bothering to stop his friend from shaking him.  _ “I’m staying here for good”  _

Then the following events were instantaneous. First, Hyunjin screams. Second, Hyunjin rushed in to give Seungmin another hug, effectively pushing themselves onto the sofa’s cushioned seats. Then lastly, laughter erupted from both as they continued to wrap their arms around each other in an embrace. It took awhile for the laughter to die down. When it did, Hyunjin pushed his upper body up from where it previously laid on Seungmin’s chest.

_ “How? Does uncle know? I can’t believe he agreed to this!” _

~~_ He didn’t. _ ~~ Seungmin knows this himself. But Hyunjin doesn’t need to know that.

_ “Yeah, Dad knows.”  _ this wasn’t a lie,  _ “I can’t believe he agreed to this too!”  _ This one was the lie. Seungmin wore the best happy face he could do to avoid any suspicion from his friend. Luckily, he doesn’t notice. 

_ “How about auntie? What did she say?”  _

_ “She was supportive of this decision”  _ ~~_She doesn’t know that I’m here_ _. _ ~~

_ “I can’t believe this right now, how long have you been planning this?”  _

_ “Not that long actually, I booked the ticket maybe two weeks ago?”  _

_ “And you didn’t tell me!”  _

_ “Well it wouldn’t be a surprise wouldn’t it?”  _

_ “You suck”  _ Hyunjin uttered, unable to think of anything else. 

The two boys laughed for a bit before they fell into silence. They were still lying on the couch, Hyunjin still on top of Seungmin, upper body propped up with his arms. Their eyes met for a moment and they both shared a smile and another round of chuckles. None of them seem to notice how awkward their position is because mainly for them it wasn’t supposed to be. But it wasn't the case from an outsiders point of view. 

_ “Hyunjin hyun - oh.”  _ The two boys on the couch turned their heads to the source,  _ “I guess this is a bad time?”  _ Jeongin spoke, standing halfway through the slightly opened door, holding plastic take-out bags from a restaurant nearby. 

_ “Innie why are you at the door,”- _ another voice could be heard outside. Not soon after the door was now fully opened to reveal Chan standing behind Jeongin, right hand carrying another one of those plastic take-out bags while his left hand was on the now opened door-  _ “Oh.”  _

Hyunjin looked both Jeongin and Chan in the eyes before looking back into Seungmin. he began to put the puzzle pieces together and when realization set in, he immediately stood up. Patting his clothes to try to remove any creases or folds. 

_ “We can come back later if you want,”  _ Chan spoke, a grin evident on his face.  _ “We're just going to put these here,”  _ he pulls a dumbstruck Jeongin by his arms and gestures to leave the take-outs on the table.  __

Hyunjin runs up to pull on Chan and Jeongin’s arms to keep them in place.  _ “Hyung! It’s not what it looks like!”  _

_ “I know what I saw!”  _ Jeongin piped up, face scrunched up in disgust, as he tried to remove Hyunjin’s hands off his arms.  _ “I am traumatized already.”  _

Chan could only laugh at the exchange. He removes Hyunjin’s hands off his arm,  _ “if nothing really happened,”  _ he nods his chin towards Seungmin,  _ “why won’t you introduce us to your..”  _ he paused.  _ “Your ‘friend’ ” _

Seungmin, who was seated up by now, straightened his back from what the other just said. He looked at Hyunjin who was waving his hand towards him. When Seungmin reached within arms-reach of Hyunjin, the latter had wrapped his hand on his waist, pulling him closer to the new faces by the door. 

_ “Chan hyung, Innie, this is my best friend, Seungmin.”  _ The boy gave them a small wave,  _ “Minnie, this”- _ Hyunjin points at the one on the right-” _ is Chan hyung.”  _ The broad shoulders and the girthy arms showed that the guy’s body was firmly built, Seungmin notes.  _ “And this”- _ Hyunjin moves his pointed finger slightly to the left- _ ”is Innie, his name is Jeongin but we call him Innie. _ ” he was a bit different from Chan. he was taller by a few centimeters, his facial features however were sharper than Chan’s. His eyes were like sharp slits. 

_ “It’s finally nice to meet you Seungmin”  _ Chan extends his right hand for a handshake in which Seungmin returned with a slight bow and a firm shake. 

_ “Finally? You know who I am?”  _ Seungmin asked. 

_ “Not by face, but we know your name.”  _ Jeongin piped up, hand reached out for another handshake. Seungmin took it the same way he took Chan’s.  _ “Hyunjin has mentioned your name a bit, well not a bit but a lot.”  _

_ “Then I hope he’s saying good things about me.”  _ Seungmin joked.

Jeongin’s innocent face immediately shifted into a mischievous one.  _ “Oh, it's more than good”  _ He gives Hyunjin a glance  _ “Really good.”  _

Judging by the look Hyunjin is giving Jeongin, he has probably murdered the younger in cold blood more than fifty times in his head right now. And if Seungmin had to guess, Hyunjin would have jumped on Jeongin by now if it wasn’t for Chan or Seungmin being in the room. 

_ “So Seungmin,”  _ Chan spoke.  _ “Have you eaten?”- _ Chan motions to the take-out bags on the table- _ ”we have take-out, and i'm sure there is enough for everybody”  _

“ _ I haven’t actually, are you sure? I don’t want to impose, I might have disrupted a special event or something”  _ Seungmin sheepishly replied. 

_ “Oh no! Don’t worry! There isn’t a special event or anything. Hyunjin just wanted company for dinner tonight.”  _

_ “If that’s the case, I hope you don’t mind” _

_ “Don’t worry about it Seungmin”  _ Chan gave him a fatherly pat on his shoulder.  _ “Come on everyone take a seat! I'm hungry!” _

Everyone followed. Chan had this authoritative tone in his voice. But it wasn’t the type that made you follow in fear which was what Seungmin is used to at home. Instead it gave you the feeling of assurance somehow. It made Chan sound so reliable, soft, and open but at the same time you could tell he means business. It's a weird combination the more Seungmin think about it. 

When they were all seated, Jeongin and Hyunjin started to take out styrofoam containers from the plastic bags. They set the styrofoam containers on the table alongside a few smaller ones containing the side dishes. The containers were then opened one by one. There was a variety of food to choose from. There was Kimbap, Jajangmyeon, Chicken, Kimchi Jeon, Egg rolls, and a few side dishes like Kimchi, Pickled radish, and even some seaweed. Chan was absolutely right, there was enough for everyone. 

Once everything was out and opened, Chan started distributing their chopsticks.  _ “Alright dig in everyone”  _

_ “Were you guys planning to eat all of this? This is a lot.”  _ Seungmin commented as he placed two slices of kimbap on his plate. 

_ “Yeah! You seem to be underestimating our appetite”  _ Hyunjin spoke with a mouthful of jeon. This gave Seungmin the biggest urge to reprimand him for talking with his mouth full. 

Thankfully Chan had the same sentiments with Seungmin.  _ “Careful Jinne, you might choke. Slow down.”  _ he said, sliding over a glass of water for Hyunjin to take in case he actually chokes.  _ “And also our Innie here is still a growing boy so he needs to eat a lot”  _ he reaches over to grab a piece of chicken and places it on Jeongin’s plate. 

_ “I’m nineteen years old.”  _ Jeongin commented. 

_ “And according to studies males stop growing at the age of twenty-one. You’re going to be a nursing student Innie, you should know this,”  _ Chan counters and points his chopsticks at Jeongin’s plate,  _ “eat up baby boy.” _

Jeongin could only give a disapproving growl. Which looked cute rather than threatening. When he noticed everyone was looking at him with even more adoration rather than fear, Jeongin decided to sulk.

_ “Hyunjin is taking up nursing too right? So you’re one year under him?”  _ Seungmin asks the sulking boy.

He nodded.  _ “What about you Seungmin-ssi? You’re the same age as Hyunjin hyung right? What course are you taking?”  _

Seungmin choked on his food from the sudden formality.  _ “Please, call me hyung.”  _ He took a large sip from his water. 

Jeongin’s question had caught Hyunjin’s interest.  _ “Yeah, speaking of school. We have like one more week left before school starts. And you said you’ll be staying here in Korea for good so I’m going to assume you’re going to school here right?”  _

Seungmin finally notices all eyes on him. Everyone is patiently waiting for his answer.  _ “So about that,”  _ Seungmin stood up and went to his luggage still unmoved from the hallway and started to rummage through it. He pulled out a piece of paper and went back to the table.  _ “I may or may not have been accepted into SKU,”  _ he slides the paper to Hyunjin. 

Chan and Jeongin both stood up and gathered behind Hyunjin, all of them reading the letter.  _ “Congratulations Mr. Kim Seungmin! We are pleased to tell you about your acceptance to SKU alongside a Fully-Covered Scholarship of a course of your choice..”  _ Hyunjin read aloud.

_ “I chose Nursing as my course. So I had to take the placements exams that were required for Nursing. They called a few days ago regarding which year level I would be, they said that I would naturally have to start as a freshman. Being homeschooled and all. However, based on my performance on the placement exams, I get to skip one year and start as a sophomore instead.”  _

_ “So we're going to be classmates?”  _ Hyunjin asked

_ “Hopefully yeah, I called them beforehand and told them I would start my enrollment process tomorrow.” _ -he takes the paper back from Hyunjin- _ ”so let’s hope the subjects I get tomorrow would match yours.” _

_ “What time are you going tomorrow?”  _

_ “I'm probably going to go in the morning since I have a scheduled meeting with the Guidance Counselor at-”  _ Seungmin fishes his phone out to check his planner,  _ “ten-thirty in morning.”  _

_ “Well I guess I’m going with you then! You’re going to need a tour guide”  _ Hyunjin proudly pats his chest.

_ “Bad idea. I’d choose another one if I were you hyung,”  _ Jeongin pipes up  _ “Hyunjin has more than ten violations for being late because I quote,”  _ -Jeongin does air quotation marks with his fingers-” _ I keep forgetting which building it is.” _

Hyunjin finally cracked and lunged at Jeongin. Which the latter easily dodged resulting in them playing chase around the apartment. At some point Hyunjin has finally caught Jeongin and is now playfully smothering him to death with a pillow. 

_ “Alright that's enough”  _ Chan pulled Hyunjin away from a laughing Jeongin.  _ “It’s getting late Innie, we have to go I still have to drive you to your dorm.”  _ Jeongin stood up and ran to the door, doging another one of Hyunjin’s attempts to lunge back at him and finally give the older a tongue out. 

Chan followed Jeongin to the door which was now opened slightly ajar.  _ “How about you Seungmin? Where are you booked? Do you need a ride?”  _ Chan offered.

_ “No thank you! I'm actually staying here”  _

Hyunjin wrapped his arm around Seungmin’s shoulder,  _ “he’s my new roommate!”  _

_ “Thats nice,”  _ Chan replied with a cheeky grin,  _ “We’ll get going now, so you guys could continue what you started a while ago.”  _

Hyunjin took the matters into his hand and ran up to slam the door.  _ “GOODBYE! HYUNG!”  _ Laughter could be heard from behind the door followed by retreating footsteps. 

Hyunjin let out a deep exhale.  _ “Finally! Im sorry about them Minnie”  _

_ “Oh no its fine, I like them already. They seem really cool. Chan hyung was like a dad and Jeongin was like an annoying little brother I never had.” _

_ “Yeah, Chan hyung acts like a dad most of the time. We call him grandpa sometimes.”  _ This earned a chuckle from Seungmin. 

Hyunjin had noticed Seungmin’s luggage still untouched by the lobby. So he took one the backpack and suitcase and dragged them behind,  _ “come, let's get you settled in for the night. I’ll show you your room”  _ Seungmin took the remaining duffle bag on the floor and followed behind Hyunjin. 

As they went through the apartment, Hyujin pointed out the rooms and important stuff. The left side of the lobby led to the dining area and the living room while right side of the main lobby led to the kitchen and into another small hallway with two rooms situated in beside each other on the left side, a storage room on the right side, and a bathroom at the end of said hallway. Hyunjin opened the door nearest to the bathroom leading into what was supposed to be Seungmin’s room. 

The room was a bit spacious and bare (as expected since nobody slept there). The walls were painted with the same grey-beige color as the exterior of the building. From the door, there was a bed located at the wall on the right alongside a nightstand and a desk. On the left there was a sliding closet with mirrors replacing the sliding doors. And directly opposite to the door was a glass wall which led into the balcony. 

_ “I’ll let you settle in,”  _ Hyunjin dropped the backpack on the bed and placed the suitcase beside it.  _ “I’ll help you unpack tomorrow after we're done with your enrollment. Feel free to use the bathroom if you need to wash up before going to bed.”  _ Seungmin nodded.  _ “I’ll be in the room next room if you need anything yeah?”  _

_ “Yeah. Thank you Jin.” _

_ “You’re welcome, roomie”  _ Hyunjin gave a small poke on Seungmin’s side with his elbow.  _ “Goodnight Minnie, I’ll see you in the morning”  _ and with that, Hyunjin left. 

Seungmin took some time to get used to the room. Walking around, feeling the furniture with his hands, and even going out into the balcony to get some air into his system.  _ This is it.  _ He thought to himself.  _ Finally starting anew.  _

With one final deep breath Seungmin was now ready. He took a bath and changed into night clothes. He laid on his new bed and was immediately knocked out. 

* * *

Usually, the thing that would wake Seungmin up would have been his alarm set for the morning. However today, it was the sounds of muffled shouts, pots and pans banging, chairs sliding across the wooden floor, and the sound of oil sizzling. 

He unplugged his phone from where it was charging to look up the time; 7:03 AM. Twenty-seven minutes before his supposed alarm was to ring. This had prompted an internal debate within Seungmin, should he stay in bed for the remaining twenty-seven minutes or should he go out and check what the ruckus was all about. 

Seungmin chose the latter option. 

He walked out his door into the hallway and the noises were getting louder and louder as he went along. And when he reached the kitchen shocked was an understatement to what he was feeling. Before his eyes he saw his best friend Hyunjin, apron on, covered in sweat. Jeongin, holding a plate with what seems to be burned bacon above the trash can. He was probably going to throw it away but stopped as he was caught red handed. And finally Chan, sitting at the table surrounded by eggshells. Holding a bowl on his left and a whisk on his right hand.

All of them frozen in place like a deer caught in headlights. None of them wanted to move. Their eyes darting from one another. 

_ "Heeeeey minnie" _ Hyunjin was the first one to break the silence.

_ "Goodmorning to you too Jin, mind telling me what you’re doing?" _ Seungmin replied with his arms crossed around his chest. Looking at the other people in the room,  _ “Goodmorning Chan hyung, Goodmorning Jeongin.” _

_ "We're making breakfast hyung,"  _ Jeongin sheepishly replied.

_ "why?"  _

a few moments of silence passed by. they probably were debating who talks.  _ "well think of this,"  _ Hyunjin motioned around with his spatula, _ "as your welcoming party!"  _ He said as he went back to the eggs he was cooking.  _ "you're finally going to school with us so this calls to celebrate!"  _

Hyunjin sounded really excited. Jeongin and Chan too, since they were nodding to everything that Hyunjin was saying. 

Seungmin tried his best to suppress the smile that was about to come out. He almost did but he had to look down so they didn't see. They might have mistaken the gesture as Seungmin being disappointed because all he heard afterwards were simultaneous voices of Chan and Jeongin saying,  _ "It was Hyunjin's idea!"  _

Seungmin looked back up to see them both pointing their fingers towards Hyunjin who looked so betrayed that his friends would rat him out like that. 

_ "I just wanted to welcome minnie! Im sor-" _

_ "No, it's fine! I appreciate it Jin you don't have to apologize"  _ Seungmin moved towards him and patted his shoulder. Giving him a bright smile. 

" _ I was just wondering how you thought that cooking was the best idea? I mean I'm sure none of you guys has ever held a pan before"  _ Seungmin was laughing now. _ "you guys probably had maids to do your cooking." _

The guilty looks on their faces alongside Chan scratching the back of his neck was more than enough for Seungmin to laugh even more. Which they all followed soon after.

_ "Hyunjin hyung said he watched a few youtube videos last night so we trusted him"  _ Jeongin, now dropping the burned bacon into the bin

_ "Which seems to be a bad choice now that you've mentioned it."  _ Chan, cleaning up the eggshells that were scattered.

As the laughter was starting to die down Seungmin cleared his throat.  _ "How about we order in? I doubt any of those would be edible," _ eyeing the supposed eggs and bacon. Hyunjin just gave Seungmin a quick jab on his arm which made everyone laugh again. 

_ "You guys order for me, I gotta take a bath first."  _ He looked at Hyunjin with his eyebrows raised asking if he wanted to take a bath first.   
  


_ "Oh I bathed a few minutes ago. Go ahead"  _

Seungmin took all his bathing essentials from his room and scurried to the bathroom.

***

  
_ "Finally! You took so long we thought you were doing something unholy."  _ a yell came from Hyunjin as Seungmin walked out his room, fully dressed and ready to go.

_ "I’m disappointed in you Jin" _ was all that Seungmin could say, giving him a disgusted look. 

Laughter came from the group, all sitting by the table covered with an assortment of boxes; take-outs. 

Walking closer toward the table Seungmin was able to really take in what is on the table,  _ "why are there so many?? how many people are eating over??"  _ glancing around trying to count how many there are. 

They all looked at Seungmin. Eyebrows raised, lips apart, everything you could see leads to a look of confusion on their faces.

_ "guys, you have 4 boxes from different restaurants, 2 containers of dessert, and a bowl of tteokbokki."  _ Seungmin was now scratching his head in confusion.  _ "How are we going to finish all of these? We barely finished the take-outs last night!" _

Hyunjin spoke up,  _ "Lets just eat what we can. Besides, Chan hyung has nothing to do today so he could bring some leftovers to his dorm. I'm sure his roommates would love it!"  _ by the time he finished his sentence Jeongin was already biting down into a piece of chicken. 

Everyone was nodding in agreement and soon after was digging in the meal that was in front of them. Seungmin followed. Eating up as much as he can. He is going to need all the energy he can get because today is going to be a very long day for him.

* * *

The trip to the school wasn’t that lengthy nor was it complicated. They only needed to ride a single bus and had to walk for a few more minutes before they reached the main gate. The school was huge. It wasn’t like highschools where they only had one building for the whole campus, this one had a lot. The buildings weren’t painted too. Rather they were kept as grey-colored from the material it was built from. (According to Hyunjin, the buildings were really old and the university refused to paint them because they wanted to preserve their “authentic” looks) 

As they went inside the main gate Seunmin had to wait for a short line before he was allowed in unlike Hyunjin who had the privilege to use the turnstile with his University ID. When Seungmin was finally able to get inside they started their school tour. 

_ “Where do we start?”  _ Seungmin asked.

_ “Well since you’re enrolling, you have a few offices to go to, so let's do them and i’ll point out the buildings and areas as we go through them.”  _

_ “Okay then. Lead the way”  _

Hyunjin starts walking first and Seungmin follows.  _ “So since your first order of business is registration,”  _ Hyunjin points to a building to their left,  _ “the registrar’s office is located in the west side of the school. In the second building over there.”  _

_ “Thats so far away!”  _ Seungmin commented

_ “Yeah but you get used to the distance soon.”  _

They went on as usual with their tour. After the registrar’s office they followed into the Nursing department’s head to get his schedule.  _ “Where is the Nursing building by the way?”  _ Seungmin asked. 

_ “Unlucky for us,”  _ Hyunjin points to the furthest building on campus,  _ “It’s waaaaaaaaaay over there”  _

_ “You’re kidding me.”  _ Seungmin stood to a stop.

Hyunjin gave him a pat on the back.  _ “I really hope I was but I’m not. This is why we Nursing students need to manage their time well. Our building is literally the furthest from the main gate.”  _

Seungmin let out a defeated sigh. _ “It seems like I'm going to lose a lot of weight this year.”  _

They resumed their walk towards the furthest building on campus. Hyunjin, along the way, pointed out some landmarks or named the buildings and which students they hold. They were able to pass through the open field in which Hyunjin told Seungmin how big events like the annual School’s Foundation day would be held there. There would be large stages set up for musicians and dancers to perform in. they would oftentimes invite famous people to perform too. 

Seungmin listened attentively to everything Hyunjin was saying. Aside from the fact that the things he was mentioning were actually important for him to avoid getting lost in this huge campus, Seungmin always liked how Hyunjin gets whenever he gets too deep into something he’s interested in. whenever these types of conversations would start, would always begin with the important information but would slowly lose track of the topic. Just like how he did when they were talking about the cafeteria. It started with the introduction to the cafeteria, then to what it sold, then their conversation shifted into Hyunjin’s most recent favorite food, then to Hyunjin’s newest discovery about his allergy to shrimp and ultimately ending up with a debate whether a burger could be considered as a sandwich. 

Some people would think it would be weird but Seungmin finds it absolutely endearing. So endearing he ends up loosing himself into the spiral too. His attempts to give comments and remarks that he hopes would take them back into their original topic, would end up further more leading the conversation into something different. It was like him throwing wood into a bonfire, expecting it to extinguish it.

Before they know it they were now at the Nursing Building. 

_ “Oh wow ok were actually here”  _ Seungmin looks up to give the building a better look now that its infront of him. 

_ “Yeah, I told you you’d get used to the distance.”  _ Hyunjin pulls Seungmin’s hand to lead them to the stairs.  _ “The Dean’s office is by the third floor”  _

Seungmin rolled his eyes.  _ “Great. More walking”  _

_ “Shut up and lets go! You’re wasting time minnie!”  _

They reach the office and Hyunjin wasted no time pushing Seungmin in and giving him a thumbs up. Seungmin nods in return. 

Not long after Seungmin was out of the office. 

_ “Okay! The dean told me to buy my books so I guess were going to the bookstore”  _ Seungmin said, waving a piece of paper.

_ “Oh that's really near, this would be quick” _

They walk down the stairs and continue their unending conversations. Their topic getting insanely absurd as the one before it. When they reach the ground floor, they took a left turn to a path leading to a building by the East side of the campus. 

Halfway through their walk into the path a notification from Seungmin’ s phone was heard. The boy pulled out his phone,  _ “shit!”  _ he exclaimed. 

Hyunjin stopped to look at Seungmin, face filled with both concern and confusion.  _ “Why? What’s wrong? Is everything alright?”  _

Seungmin wasted no time grabbing Hyunjin by his hand and effectively went on running opposite from where they were supposed to be heading. Hyunjin almost stumbles down from the sudden change in pace. 

_ “Seungmi- what are yo- where are we going?” _ Being unable to comprehend the sudden rush that overcame Seungmin, Hyunjin decides to just go with whatever is happening. He picked up his pace and settled into a much more appropriate footing so he could run properly. Hyunjin was ahead of Seungmin now, smiling back at the younger.  _ “Where are we going?” _ He asks Seungmin in between breaths.    
  
_ “To the Guidance Office! It’s almost ten-thirty! I can’t believe we almost forgot about it!”  _

The only appropriate thing that should be in Seungmin’s mind right now was that he was almost late for the meeting but that wasn’t that case. He couldn’t stop smiling back at Hyunjin. Running with him- both of them panting, often taking deep breaths trying to get some air into their system, reminded him of what they used to be before everything went downhill for Seungmin. 

_ “Alright then,”  _ Hyunjin looked forward, his smile not once leaving his face as they kept on running. They were running back towards the main gate now, passing by a few of the buildings that Hyunjin had introduced to Seungmin during their so-called “tour” of the University. Seungmin tried to recall the names of the said buildings knowing that he would be passing by them soon but there was no success there. All that was in his mind was his hand that he noticed was still wrapped around Hyunjin’s wrist. He knew Hyunjin wasn’t stumbling anymore, so he decided to let go of his wrist. Clearly that wasn’t what Hyunjin wanted because before their hands were able to separate, he took Seungmin’s hands into his. 

Taken aback with the sudden action, Seungmin was about to remove their interlocking hands- but was stopped when the other gave his hand a squeeze. Locking them more together. 

_ “Don’t,” _ Hyunjin spoke,  _ “I haven’t shown you where the office is, you’ll get lost.”  _ and from a simple sentence like that, he was convinced. Hyunjin was right, he would have been even more late if he would get lost. And if that would have happened Seungmin knew he wouldn’t be able to forgive himself. So he did what he had to do, he stopped resisting the gesture his best friend gave him as they continued to run.

_ “I won’t let you go.” _

It was that sentence that took him by surprise and made him immediately look up at Hyunjin with wide eyes and parted lips. He was greeted with Hyunjin’s eyes looking back at him with nothing but sincerity written on them and the smile that he had on ever since they started running. 

_ “Let me be your guide Seungmin” _

And that damn smile grew even wider. 

* * *

They've reached the office less than five minutes ago. and they had a few more to spare before Seungmin had to go inside for his meeting. They took those extra minutes to catch their breaths. 

_ "Yah! minnie! What are you still doing here outside? Get in!"  _

_ "We're taking a break,"  _ Seungmin replied in between deep breaths.  _ "and plus I have a few minutes to spare, we wait for a bit.”  _ Seungmin took out his phone from his back pocket.

A click of a tongue and a deep exhale was all the warning Hyunjin gave Seungmin before ultimately snatching the phone from his hand. Followed by the younger trying their best to grab their phone back but Hyunjin had now raised his arm as high as he could and stood on his toes to add more to the height. With his free hand on Seungmin’s chest he pushed the younger backwards with ease.  _ “You’re getting this phone back after your meeting. I need you to focus right now” _ flashing Seungmin a teasing grin. 

_ “I’m fine jinnie.”  _ he stood up straight, trying to show his friend that he was ready for the meeting- but seemed to have overdone it since Hyunjin had to push his shoulder down with both his hands. 

_ “Minnie you’re as stiff as a wooden plank right now,”  _ Hyunjin was laughing as he raised his hands towards Seungmin’s hair- giving it a quick fix. His hair must have looked awful, Seungmin thought to himself. They did run while coming here so it was understandable.  _ “And there is no way you’re going in there when your hair is this messy.” _

What was supposed to be a quick hair fix turned into a whole outfit check with Hyunjin turning Seungmin around from time to time, checking every bit of fabric that was covering Seungmin. Dusting off any dirt or foreign substances he could spot. Straightening any wrinkles that had formed around his shirt and trousers. 

_ “Jinnie I think that's enough, “  _ Seungmin grabbed on a shoulder and pulled a crouching Hyunjin upright. A chuckle came out of Seungmin,  _ “ if I let you continue I’m sure I’m going to actually be late.”  _

The only response Hyunjin gave was a quick apology while scratching the back of his neck.  _ “Sorry hehe”  _

_ “I’m going in now yeah”  _

Hyunjin nodded in response. “ _ Yeah, Goodluck Minnie! Fighting!”  _

_ “Fighting!”  _

And with that final response Seungmin turned around and walked towards the door. He gave Hyunjin a quick glance, seeing Hyunjin raise two thumbs up and flashing him a smile. Seungmin reciprocates the gesture and goes inside the office. 

The office wasn’t as big as Seungmin thought it would be. Upon entering the office he immediately was greeted with a counter-like structure just a few steps in front of him. There was only one person behind it- a young lady in navy blue pencil dress uniform. She must be the secretary. On his left were what seemed to be cubicles. Six of them, all placed back to back. This must be where the others would sit. And on his right he could see an opened glass door that leads to another room. Looking properly at the opened glass door he could see a plaque hanging from it that says “Guidance Counselor.” now he knows where he would be going in. A few moments passed and Seungmin was still standing by the door like he was glued to it, he was too busy studying the room, looking around like a lost kid. 

_ “Hi! May I help you?”  _ the lady behind the counter suddenly spoke- bringing Seungmin back into his proper senses.

Seungmin stepped forward and placed his hands on the counter,  _ “Oh- um Hi Good Morning, I'm here to meet the counselor.”  _

_ “May I ask for your name?”  _ the young woman was now looking at the folder she just took out. 

_ “Kim Seungmin”  _

_ “Ah, I see, you have one at 10:30AM,”  _ she looked down at the copper watch around her wrist,  _ “oh it seems like it's supposed to be your turn now, “  _ she looked to her left and saw the opened glass door. 

_ “there was someone before you, I’m not sure if they left already. Do you mind if you peek inside for a bit?”  _

Seungmin nodded and followed as instructed. He walked towards the opened glass door and peeked inside, air conditioned air hitting his face. What he saw was nothing out of the ordinary. An older lady, maybe in her 40’s, sitting behind a desk with a calm demeanor. With kind eyes she looked at the boy in front of her- seemingly listening to whatever they were mumbling about. Seungmin couldn’t see much from the boy other than his raven-colored hair, a leather jacket covering his wide shoulders, black jeans, and converse shoes. From the looks of it he seems to be dressed up as a cliché-looking bad boy from the movies. But nothing about the boy looked scary- cause there is one thing for certain. In terms of height, the boy was on the shorter side of the spectrum. If he really was one of the so-called bad boys then Seungmin would have nothing to worry about.

Having seen everything he needed to, Seungmin walked back to the counter and the young lady behind it. He closed the glass door behind him slowly as he could to avoid disturbing the conversation between the two people inside the room. 

_ “Someone is still inside, should i wait here?”  _ he asked.

_ “Sure, thankyou for checking for me. Feel free to sit down. I’ll call you when you’re up ok?”  _ she was motioning towards the empty chairs by the door. 

Seungmin followed and sat down. 

A few moments passed and a knock on the door prompted Seungmin and the secretary behind the counter to look towards the door. The door knob twists and the door fully opens to reveal Hyunjin’s tall figure peeking in with Jeongin following behind. The both looked at their friend sitting by their left side before looking forward to the secretary. 

_ “Good morning Ms. Oh”  _ they both bowed as they entered. 

_ “Hello Hyunjin, Jeongin.” _ she bowed back and returned a soft smile towards the boys  _ “What brings you two here today?”  _

_ “Oh were here with this guy,”  _ Jeongin pointed towards Seungmin 

_ “Yeah we just wanted to talk to him before he goes inside”  _ Hyunjin followed. 

_ “Alright, be quick about it though, I think he’s going to get inside soon.”  _ the secretary was looking at the glass door that led to the Counselor's room. 

Both Hyunjin and Jeongin nodded and faced Seungmin.  _ “So Jeongin texted me a few minutes ago,”  _ Hyunjin brought up his arm and wrapped it around the youngest’s shoulder, bringing him close.  _ “He said we should go to lunch after this”  _

_ “Sure! I'm down,”  _ Seungmin nodded.  _ “Will you wait for me outside?”  _

_ “Yeah, we’ll be waiting for you outsi-”  _

Hyunjin was interrupted by a loud THUD coming from the glass door, making everyone inside the room look to where it came from. 

The boy inside behind the door was now on the floor, holding his head. Face twisting into a mixture of pain, anger, and embarrassment. The boy looked up and saw people looking at him through the glass door. His face immediately turned tomato-red as he stood up immediately. Pushing the door open and walking out the room as everyone’s eyes followed him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you're still here and is actually waiting for updates then i would really like to thank you so much! i didn't think writing would be this hard! but i really plan to finish this one. I CAN DO THIS!
> 
> if you would also like you may follow me on twitter! @itsmrcgo (idk how to make this into a hyperlink)
> 
> comment your thoughts and suggestions for me! :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Changbin isn't as welcomed in SKU than he thought he was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW // Blood and Descriptions of self harm.
> 
> A TRIGGER WARNING ON THIS ONE. somewhere along the chapter Changbin unconsciously harms himself. It contained a bit of a GRAPHIC DESCRIPTION OF THE SELF HARM on it and BLOOD was mentioned. 
> 
> if you wish to read through it, the self harm starts at the paragraph after:  
> "Chanbin sees nothing but blurred colors."
> 
> and ends at:  
> "With the little strength he has left he moved his left hand to grab on to Jisung’s wrist, giving it a slight squeeze."
> 
> READ WITH CAUTION PLEASE

Usually when you’re going into the Guidance Office there are two reasons for your visits. Either- One, you’re there for some good deed you did and they’re going to praise and reward you, or Two, you’re there because you fucked up. That’s it. There is absolutely no in-between. So it is absolutely acceptable for Changbin to feel even more nervous now that the Counselor is right in front of him. He fully enters the room and makes sure to leave the door open like he always does.

_ "Good morning Mrs. Moon"  _ Changbin bowed.

Mrs. Moon looked up from the papers she was working on to give Changbin a warm smile which immediately shifted into concern as she noticed Changbin’s solo presence. 

_ “Good morning Mr. Seo,”- _ she motions to the chair in front of her desk for him to sit down- _ ”please sit down.”  _ Changbin removed his bag from his shoulder, placed it on the floor beside the chair and sat down. 

Mrs. Moon patiently waited for Changbin to sit down and look at her before she began to speak again,  _ “I’m sorry for asking. However, I noticed that you’re alone right now,”  _ she hesitates for a bit, stuttering out some  _ um’s  _ and  _ uh’s _ before she finally found the words to say  _ “I’m just worried that since you’re..” _ -she motions her index finger to tap on her right ear- _ ”you know, deaf. I was wondering if you would like me to call someone? Your friends maybe?”  _

It has only been less than three minutes and Chanbin already knows this meeting is going to go downhill.  ~~_ Reason two _ ~~ ~~,~~ he thought. He felt like tiny needles were being poked into him like he was some sort of pincushion. The nail of his index finger scraping on the sensitive skin around the thumb’s nail was the only thing keeping him grounded right now. 

Changbin tried to sound as calm as he could.  _ “I don’t think what would be necessary Mrs. Moon. I can read your lips. You don’t need to call anyone. Just please look at me when you’re talking.”  _

She nodded.  _ “Alright then. Don’t hesitate to ask if you don’t understand something ok? I’ll be glad to repeat it”  _ she smiled, but at this point Changbin knows it isn’t real. 

Changbin only nodded in response. 

_ “So, I'm going to start now.”  _ She paused for a bit, probably trying to see if Changbin understood. She continued,  _ “as you can tell, you’ve been here in SKU for three years now Mr. Seo. How are you doing so far?”  _

_ “I’m doing great. Thank you.”  _

_ “That’s good to hear.”  _ both her hands start to clasp together as she laid her forearms on the table,  _ “You know, you’re the first disabl-''  _ she pauses for a second  _ ”-hearing impaired student to be accepted here in SKU _ '' she looks at Changbin trying to assess again if he’s able to catch up so far,  _ “and we think of that as a very generous favor to you. Especially since we’ve offered you a fully-paid scholarship.”  _

Changbin’s brain had done a complete reboot after what he just heard. Was he hearing that right? Why did it sound like he was some kind of charity case. He deserved that scholarship. He studied and worked hard to be able to get top five scores for the college entrance exams. How in the world was it “given” to him? That’s absolutely fucking unfair. Changbin was too deep into thought that he wasn’t able to hear- no, read what Mrs. Moon said next, the only thing he was able to catch was her saying,  _ “-mentorship program.”  _

_ “I’m sorry but could you repeat what you just said?” _ Chanbin was really trying his best right now to be calm. She smiles, but based on the rise and fall from her shoulders and chest, Changbin knew she just gave out one hella deep exhale. 

_ “Since we offered you a fully-paid scholarship,”  _ she continued,  _ “the board has decided that as a ‘thank you’ to the school, we’re going to require you to do at least six hours of community service here in school. You may choose to help any office here in school. But, if I could suggest, one of the students in my program has graduated so I’m currently missing manpower. I would like to offer you to work as a mentor for the Mentorship program here in SKU.” _

Ok. Now Changbin is angry.  _ “I’m sorry but I don’t understand why I have to do six hours of community service?”  _ he was now at the edge of his seat, left hand balled up and right hand fidgeting with his nails.  _ “I’m currently in my Junior year! I don’t have time for that! And alongside that I still have a part-time job! I don’t have the time for that mentorship thing!”  _

_ “Mr. Seo I understand that you are busy. However, think about the school, we’ve given you a scholarship, the least you could do is do this as a thank you.”  _

Changbin’s index finger is feeling wet and sticky now. But that doesn’t compensate for the rage he’s feeling right now. “I don’t owe you anything!” he stood from his chair.  _ “I got the scholarship because I worked hard for it. I studied for countless nights to get that top spot. The only thing about that scholarship is that I absolutely deserve it.”  _

_ “Yes, and we are very proud that you were able to get that high. But if you think about it, the scholarship could have been given to someone else, some other studen-”  _

_ “Someone who isn’t deaf.”  _ Changbin cut her off.  _ “Someone who doesn’t need to be monitored. Someone who is normal.”  _

_ “That’s now what I was going to say Mr. Seo”  _

Changbin could only scoff at her reply.  _ “It was going there anyway.”  _

_ “Mr. Seo, I understand what you feel right now”  _ _ no you don’t  _ _ “However the board has already made their decision. It is out of my hands Mr. Seo. I’m sorry.”  _

_ “What happens if I can’t do the six-hours service?”  _ Changbin kept his gaze unfaltering. He isn’t hiding his anger anymore. They need to know how angry he is. 

_ “We’re going to have to terminate your scholarship contract.”  _

Changbin could not comprehend how the hell she said that so easily. To say that without even batting an eye to the situation he is in is absolutely fucked up. And to think she’s supposed to be Guidance Counselor for fucks sake. You’re supposed to make people feel safe within this room. Not make them hate themselves. 

_ “You can’t do that.”  _ was the only thing Changbin could croak out. 

_ “I’m sorry Mr. Seo”  _

At this point Changbin’s breathing became rapid and shallow. He’s sweating, palms getting moist and his thumb feeling wet and throbbing in pain. Arms on his side, he looked down and took a deep breath and held it in for a few seconds before giving it out in a long exhale to try and normalize his breathing. He did this a few more times before he was calm enough to continue the conversation. 

He looked up at Mrs. Moon, his eyes focused on her straight in the eyes,  _ “How long do I have left for me to do the six-hours? Do I have a deadline for it?”  _

She starts rummaging through her papers and pulls out the one at the very bottom. She reads through it for a moment before speaking with her head still looking down. Changbin could see she was talking, but he can’t read her lips if he can’t even see it. 

_ “Please look at me, I can’t read your lips”  _ Changbin reminded her. 

She immediately looks up and offers a small “sorry” before repeating what she said,  _ “you start next week, and in terms of deadline,”  _ She paused, trying to see if Changbin had caught up,  _ “you have to do six-hours a week.”  _

_ “You can’t be serious.”  _ Changbin rubbed the palms of his hands on his face.  _ “I have to do at least an hour a day? It's like you’re adding a class to my schedule! Don’t I get to have a say on this?”  _

_ “It’s a unanimous vote from the board. We cannot do anything now Mr. Seo.”  _

_ “This is absurd!”  _ Changbin flailed his arms about. 

_ “You don’t have to make the decision right now Mr. Seo, but we expect a response by next week.” _

_ “Understood. Thank you Mrs. Moon.”  _ Changbin wasted no time giving out his farewell along with a respectful bow. He’s angry. No, he’s absolutely enraged. His head was throbbing, his breathing was getting much more erratic, his skin seeping out sweat to the point where he could feel his shirt stick on him, his hands moist from sweat and his thumb sticky. Everything was getting into his nerves right now. It felt like there were bombs in his veins just waiting for that trigger for it to explode. He needed to get out. 

He picks up his bag on the floor beside his chair and puts the strap up his shoulder. And quickly walked away. With his mind swarming with thoughts he let his body do all the work. He let his feet carry his body towards the door. Only to be stopped by a glass door- which he ran into with a loud THUD. With the speed at how he quickly walked away from the office and the strength of a glass door they both were enough for Changbin to lose footing and fall on his ass.

Mrs. Moon quickly stood up from her chair and tried to approach the boy on the floor. 

_ “I’m fine.”  _ Changbin refused her help and stood up by himself. He turned to Mrs. Moon and gave her one final bow,  _ “I’m sorry for the fuss Mrs. Moon. I’ll see myself out.” _

The thoughts within Changbin’s head disappeared for a moment, because the only thing on his mind right now is who the hell closed the door. He was absolutely sure that he kept the door open. Was someone playing a sick prank on him again? They did this last time, they might do it again. 

He vigorously shook his head to keep his mind away from those. He walked to the door and made sure to grab the handle on the way. He pulled the door open and was immediately greeted by four pairs of eyes on him. Normally he’d be fucking embarrassed right now. But the smirk painted on one of the faces looking at him at the other one trying his best not to laugh basically confirmed his thoughts. So he did what he usually did. He looked down and quickly walked out the room. Ignoring the eyes that followed him throughout his walk to the door. 

* * *

Changbin entered the Guidance Office with high hopes. Yet, he left with the hopes shattered and replaced with an avalanche of voices in his head. First it was Mrs. Moon treating him like damaged goods. Then it was the sudden implication of “you owe the school for your scholarship” which he practically starved himself to study for. And then to make things even worse, they really had to embarrass him like that. 

It’s days like these that make Changbin wonder how much of an asshole he was in his previous life to deserve this now. 

The trip back to the shared apartment was a blur for Changbin. He vaguely recalls walking into the bus stop and sitting down. The bus trip was the same too. Now he’s sitting down on the couch in the living room, head rested on the couch’s backrest, eyes closed, and his arms spread across the whole couch- his index finger fidgeting on the sensitive skin around the thumb’s nail like they always do. His ears have only heard nothing but ringing. His head is throbbing even more - way worse than it did when he was inside the guidance office. He can’t seem to focus on anything right now. His eyes may be glued to the blotch of old paint on the ceiling but Chanbin sees nothing but blurred colors. 

He’s sweating like crazy. He isn’t sure if he turned on the air-conditioning or at least a fan when he came inside the apartment (he doesn’t even remember going inside the apartment in the first place.) His breathing starts to go erratic again. Becoming more and more rapid and very shallow. His fingers are fidgeting faster now. His nail scratching the thumb harder and more frequent. It’s starting to hurt. Changbin was surprised he felt it and yet he can’t stop. The pain getting more intense as his fingers keep moving on their own. 

Then he feels something tighten around his fingers. A hand had wrapped around his index finger and another hand wrapping around his thumb. Changbin’s fingers tried to resume what they were doing but the hands kept them from moving. Changbin feels the hand move and caress his palm and the back of his hand. It was soothing. It kept going on like that until the new sensations were able to pull Changbin out of his headspace. 

With him finally in control of his body and their senses. He feels it rub against his palm again so he moves his head slightly to the right.

Changbin was met with Jisung kneeling down by the sofa, trying his best not to break. He sees Jisung’s mouth move. He could barely read Jisung’s lips but he was able to decipher a _“please stop-'' Jisung_ kept repeating it as if Changbin could hear him, _“hyung, please stop it”_ Changbin reads again and Jisung continues to look down, trying to hold the tears back. Changbin focuses on his hand and he sees Jisung’s hands on his own, holding back his index finger and his thumb. And he sees what Jisung is referring to. 

Jisung’s hand wrapped around Changbin’s index finger whose tip was smudged with blood. Jisung’s other hand was around his thumb too, but his thumb - his thumb wasn’t smudged, rather it was covered in blood. It was seeping down into his wrist and ultimately staining the cushion red. The skin around his thumb was the source, it was open and actively bleeding from the inordinate amount of scratches it received from the index finger. 

~~_ I did it again. _ ~~

With the little strength he has left he moved his left hand to grab on to Jisung’s wrist, giving it a slight squeeze. Jisung quickly shot his head up from the pressure. Eyes wide, tears threatening to flow down on his round cheeks. Changbin lifts his hand to cup Jisung’s face and wipe it before it falls.

_ “Please stop”  _ Jisung croaked out with a hoarse voice. 

_ “Don’t cry,”  _ Changbin said softly. He hated when Jisung cried. The boy doesn’t deserve it. He deserves every drop of happiness there is. But Changbin hated it most when Jisung cried because of him. 

_ “I will stop crying if you stop it”  _ Jisung pouted, tears still threatening to fall from his eyes. 

Changbin gave him the best smile he could, which ended up as a half-smile due from the lack of energy.  _ “Deal”  _

Jisung sniffles and asks,  _ “Hyung, color?”  _ usually color systems like these was used for the usual sexual intercourse (which is why Jisung learned it from his Sex Ed class) but when it was introduced to the boy, he immediately thought of its use to be for situatuons like these. People might think it's inappropriate but for the best friends Changbin and Jisung, it works.

_ “Yellow. Im sorry sungie”  _

_ “Don't be sorry, ok?”  _ Jisung turns to look at his hands that were still wrapped around Changbin’s fingers.  _ “Lets clean you up?”  _

Changbin nodded. Jisung let go of Changbin’s right hand and went to the bathroom to retrieve the first aid kit along with a basin of water and a towel. 

After a few minutes of wiping off the blood from Changbin’s hand and a few more of dressing the wound and patching the wound up Jisung was finally able to put his mind at ease. Those few minutes of putting Changbin back to shape was filled with comforting silence between the two. Changbin’s silence was from a loss of words meanwhile Jisung’s was from an understanding that his best friend wasn’t ready to talk yet. He knows so well that nothing comes from prying something from the other so he does what he always does, he waits. 

When all things were done and everything was returned to their places, both boys are on the floor - unable to sit on the couch with one of the cushions currently in the washer. Jisung is leaning back on the couch while Changbin is laying down, head on top of the other’s lap as Jisung’s hand soothingly combs through his hair. They don’t talk. They just sit there in silence, letting their minds run on their own individually. 

The silence was broken by a deep exhale from Changbin.  _ “I’m sorry Ji.”  _ Changbin’s eyes still glued to the same blotch of old paint he was staring at moments ago. 

Jisung nods in response. He taps Changbin to make him look at him, **_“Color?”_** Jisung signs,. 

_ “Somewhere between yellow and green”  _ Changbin vocalizes, still too weak to sign it out.    
  


**_“Well, that's progress,”_** Jisung pats Changbin’s head, **_“baby steps hyung. Baby steps.”_**

Changbin could only see the other boy was smiling at him, so he turned his attention back to the ceiling and nodded. 

They stay like that again for a few more minutes until the silence was broken again. Rather than a voice, it was broken by the sound of rumbling. Changbin was hungry. They both looked at each other as the sound was vibrating throughout the apartment. 

Jisung smirks,  **_“you hungry?”_ ** __

Changbin lifts up his arms and covers his face from embarrassment and only nods. 

The other could only give out a small laugh as he starts to scroll his phone for the delivery service’s phone number in his contacts. Jisung slowly removed Changbin’s arms from his face so that he could see what he was signing, **_“What do you want to eat? Chicken? We could ask the delivery man to stop for ice-cream from the convenience store along the way,”_** he changes his focus to phone for a second and focus back the boy on his lap **_“i’ll get you your favorite,”_**

_ “Almonds?”  _ Changbin asks, eyes looking at Jisung as his arms still cover the lower half of his face. 

Jisung smiles and nods.  _ “Almonds.”  _

Jisung takes a moment to send the orders. When he was done, he placed his phone on his side and his hands went back to combing Changbin’s hair. 

They wait for their food in the same comforting silence they’ve surrounded themselves with. 

* * *

A knock from the door signals the arrival of their long awaited feast. Changbin, feeling slightly at par with his emotions, offers to open the door. Jisung doesn’t deny him. He lets go of Changbin’s hair and helps Changbin up by pushing him up. 

Changbin takes his time to walk to the door. His mind might be doing better but it doesn’t mean the same thing for his energy. He opened the door and immediately felt arms wrapping around his torso. He looked up and could only see a person with blonde hair tightly snuck on his chest and another person behind them. It takes a moment for Changbin to realize that it was Minho behind the blonde haired boy - who he’s absolutely sure is Felix. He reciprocates the hug and looks back at Jisung who only gave him a smile. 

a tap on his shoulder makes him turn his head back,  _ “Jisung texted us to get you some take out and ice cream.”  _ he reads from Minho’s lips. 

He feels soft vibrations on his chest. Felix must be saying something; so he slightly pulls back so he can see the blonde’s face.  _ “I downloaded some movies too! _ ” Felix says and starts to fully let go of Changbin. He starts raising hands to sign,  _ “ _ **_We. movie,”_ ** -Felix hesitates for a moment, eyes rolled up and his tongue slightly out as he tries to remember what to say next-  **_“Together”_ ** he finishes. 

Felix made a mistake with how he signed which made Jisung and Changbin laugh at the effort. Felix looks around the room trying to assess the situation, face contorted into confusion. Changbin grabs Felix’s hands and repositions them right, and slowly guides them to do the correct motion. Felix, upon realizing the mistake he made, immediately blushes. He’s signing  **_“Sorry”_ ** again and again. 

Minho has placed the take-outs on the table as the chaos of laughter erupted from the group as Felix keeps on apologizing like he’s committed a heinous crime. Once done, Minho calls everyone’s attention and points to the table; looking at Changbin to wobbly sign  **_“Eat”_ ** with his hands. 

Unlike Jisung, who started to learn sign language when he was fifteen, a year after Changbin lost his hearing, Minho and Felix had only decided to learn it just recently. The two never really had a reason to learn it since they’ve only met Changbin two years ago. They got through conversations for the past two years through Changbin’s lip reading and sometimes Jisung being a translator. But now that Jisung is in his sophomore year his academic load has been increasing so they didn’t want to add more to his plate. 

Considering their pace, Felix and Minho are actually doing pretty good in learning sign language. They might forget a sign or two ever so often or even jumble up the sentence pattern when signing, Changbin could understand them and appreciates the effort (although he was absolutely against them doing the classes in the first place since he didn’t want to burden them with more stuff to learn.) 

With everyone gathered around the small table by the dining room Minho, the eldest amongst the group, gave the go signal to finally start digging in for lunch. Felix immediately reached out to take out a piece of dumpling and tossed it in his mouth. Jisung took a piece of fishcake from the styrofoam containers and placed it on Changbin’s plate and mouths  _ “Eat up”  _ alongside a nod towards the contents on his plate. Changbin did so and took a bite from the fishcake; only then was Jisung at ease and took some food for himself and sat down. 

Felix initiated the conversation. He started talking about how he started watching Lilo and Stitch and that it was his newest obsession. Not only did he cry out a swimming pool’s worth of tears when Nani started singing to Lilo but he started to look up some Hawaiian dances afterwards. He then proceeded to show everyone his newest wallpaper which was no other than the blue monster himself, Stitch. Next was Jisung telling everyone how he had successfully downed more than five cups of coffee a few days ago (how Jisung is still alive right now is a mystery for the group) during one of his so called “Production Day” where he tries to milk out the most songs he could in a single single day. 

They continue on that way. Everyone gives out their own shares of stories and topics to keep the conversation going. Everyone except Changbin. He didn’t share anything with the group but he was listening. He gave out some laughs, reactions, asking someone to repeat something he wasn’t able to catch, and even some retaliation from Jisung’s teasing. No one complained though. They might not know what happened to Changbin and they didn’t want to push it. 

Time flew by so fast and eventually they’ve reached the end of their hangout. The clock struck 3 PM and that was the cue for Minho and Felix to leave since they still had some things to do. They start to clean up; Jisung storing the leftovers in plastic tupperwares to be placed in the fridge later. They bid their goodbyes as Felix and Minho leave through the door. 

Both Changbin and Jisung sat down by the floor again, still unable to sit on the sofa. Jisung starts to scroll on his phone and Changbin just lays there and stares at the ceiling again. 

Changbin feels a tap on his shoulder. 

_ “Hyung”  _ Jisung speaks up

Changbin only looks at him, waiting for him to continue. 

**_“What happened?”_ ** Jisung cautiously signs

**_“With what?”_ ** Changbin replies

**_“You know what I mean hyung.”_ ** Jisung pauses for a bit,  **_“if you’re not ready to tell me that’s fine.”_ **

And he’s right. Changbin feels too emotionally detached right now to talk about it. He thought that maybe the group lunch would bring him back to surface but as much as it did pull him up a bit, he was still under the water. Suffocating. Changbin knows that he can’t stay under for long. He has to swim up at some point. 

But today isn’t the day. So he just shakes his head in response. 

Jisung could only sigh. It's supposed to make Changbin feel bad right now and yet he feels nothing. He allows himself to disappoint Jisung today. 

He stands up,  _ “I’m going to sleep.”  _ he says and starts to walk to his room without even looking back. 

Before he could close the door to his room, Jisung stopped it with his foot. Changbin looks up to Jisung and sees nothing but sadness in his best friend’s face. 

Jisung raises his hands to sign,  **_“I don’t know what kind of feeling you’re feeling right now nor do I know what caused them. But please don’t shut me out. Talk to me. I’m here.”_ **

Changbin looked down in shame,  _ “Okay.”  _

Jisung removes his foot and Changbin shuts the door. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry Changbin. i really am :( so Changbin and Seungmin hasn't officially met yet and there is already beef going on between them ooof. This chapter was a bit gloomy than usual because Changbin's behavior would be important later on. so please do bear with me! 
> 
> also! good news! were almost done with the intro! one more chapter (chapter 5, which focuses on Seungmin's talk with the guidance counselor) and the main part of the story will finally take place! so chapter 6 would focus on the start of a new school year and HOPEFULLY (maybe on chapter 6 or other chapters, who knows hehehe >:] ) our stars Changbin and Seungmin will finally meet! 
> 
> but i do also bring some bad news :( although my update schedule is really slow, its going to probably get alot slower :( im about to begin my Clinical Duties this week so its going to be busy for me! but i will try my best! however, if you guys want to talk or interact with me, im really active on twitter so you can interact with me there! (pls do follow me i only have like 7 followers)
> 
> p.s i learned to hyperlink YEAH so
> 
> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/itsmrcgo)


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